9. oh god :(

i'm feeling like i used to.
really depressed, sort of empty, everythings pointless.

it's such a crap feeling, but i know it'll pass.

anyway, on a more cheerful note...

i'm ill today, so i have to stay in. which, considering tom got a tenner off me yesterday and promised to give me it back today, is pretty shit.
last night, he said i had to pay for the weed, cause he'd be paying on friday. i said, alright. cause i'm a sucker.
and he took the money, said "go home for like 20 minutes while we go pick up, i'll call you when we should meet back."
then he fucking calls me, says "nobody has any ten's tonight, what a shame, i gotta go anyway, i'll give you the money back tomorrow."

i was so pissed off lol.
but oh well, guys are dickheads, that's the way things go.

speaking of dickheadish guys, franky, the ex, has been posting things on facebook all yesterday and this morning about me, then deleting it if i comment.
the latest one says that i'm a 'slaggish bitch'.
but... i'm not a slag. the only person i've ever slept with is him.
and i'm not a bitch... i broke up with him for a lot of reasons, but none of them were to hurt him- i wanted to try and do it in the least painful way possible! and all i want is for him to get over me.
but he's just being a spiteful dickhead at the moment.

WHY ARE GUYS SUCH DICKS?!

oh, and continuing the bad news, i have an afterschool detention tomorrow.
for skipping lessons in town. dont really care though, nothing better to do.

and continuing the bad news, something which actually really upset me,
my ipod got confiscated first lesson on monday, and i'm not getting it back til the end of friday.
i dont know how to survive without music :(
i'm listening to music on spotify at the moment, but it's not great, and obviously it doesn't work if i'm not on the computer...

oh, and i have 2 exams tomorrow i only found out about yesterday.

i'm so ill and depressed today, i think i might just sleep all day, meet up with tom, get really high, then sleep again.
that sounds good to me.
well, better than sitting on facebook and this all day making pointless posts and listening to music.

if i had some good films, i could lay in bed all day, but i dont, and i wont be able to sleep cause i have a high temperature and i'm not tired...
SUCKISH.

i'm gonna go, before i complain any more, cause i know when i read this back through, i'm gonna see it as so pathetic...



underground - eminem
b.y.o.b - system of a down